Fearless Open-Heartedness: Risks and Rewards

By Nicole Urdang | September 2, 2009
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Yes, you’re right.  If you open your heart you risk getting hurt.  But, what’s the alternative?  A life devoid of love and passion?  How alluring is that?  The illusion of safety may be appealing, but over-protection usually leads to isolation.  Is there a way to shield yourself and still be receptive?  Not that I know […]

How to Handle: “Get over it already.”

By Nicole Urdang | July 23, 2009
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There seems to be a prevailing philosophy that all grief should disappear in a short time.  Its mantra, “Get over it already,” is uttered incessantly, whether you just broke-up, lost a job, had an accident, or buried a loved one. What’s the rush, and whose healing schedule are you on? Surely, not theirs. Grief work […]

The Gift of Disillusion

By Nicole Urdang | June 30, 2009
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I want to talk to you about the gift of disillusion and its ultimate reward: accepting life on life’s terms. Clinging to illusions starts early. We all want to believe in Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, and magic.  They soothe and bolster our spirits. Of course, we are loath to relinquish them. Even as adults, […]

Reflections on Your Relationship

By Nicole Urdang | June 8, 2009
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    There may be times after your break-up or divorce when you question why you are not with your ex.  Perhaps, you hear that s/he is with someone else, you have a lonely moment, or, suddenly, you remember a happy time.  It’s normal to wonder whether you made the right decision.  Very often, life-changing […]

The Most Important Relationship You’ll Ever Have

By Nicole Urdang | May 31, 2009
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  The most important relationship you’ll ever have is with you.  Considering that you are with yourself every minute of every day, why not make this your most loving alliance?   While there are many reasons for not having developed a great bond with yourself, there’s no upside in cataloguing them.  In lieu of focusing […]

Sex, Drugs, and Rock ‘n’ Roll

By Nicole Urdang | April 11, 2009
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It’s very tempting, when you are suddenly free from the constraints of a committed relationship, to want to party hearty.  But, as my father used to say, “Act in haste and repent at leisure.” By all means, date; but, be careful. I am not simply talking about safety here, or STDs, but your emotional state. […]